Intolerance

The other day I was listening to my Wheel of Time audiobook while doing my morning walk and I suddenly got so annoyed I had to turn it off. I'm at the beginning of book six, but that isn't really relevant. It's not really Jordan's fault. I know that the books are full of sexism that is related to the source of magic and the Breaking of the World and that the way that the different factions in the story have their reasons to deliberately misunderstand and misrepresent information is part of the tension of the tale. I get that. (There is also the real-world fact that we draw our conclusions from the available data, even when those conclusions are incorrect.) Unfortunately that sort of thing is way too real and present in the real world and I just couldn't take anymore. (Zealots doggedly stepping to the drum that leads the party conga line. Racists not understanding the core of their own racism. Gender and sex issues that reflect fear and ignorance of human nature. Grinding poverty that kills people every day. The plain bullshit that affects the human race on a daily basis.)

I'm not generally a cynic and I believe in the good that is in our world and that it is everywhere and at all times, not just when the news decides to report it, but damn it, I 'read' for enjoyment, for escapist reasons, for fun. It was just too close to home for my world-weary brain. So I apologize to Mr. Jordan for tuning out on his book for awhile. I will return to your world because I want to find out how your dipshit protagonists finally grow up and accept the responsibilities that they were apparently born for. Just not right now.

Emotionally Dishevelled

That's how I feel today. I couldn't even take a shower correctly. While I was refilling the hair care product bottles I mixed up the shampoo and conditioner and put conditioner in the shampoo bottle and didn't realize it until I was trying to get my hair to sud up. Then the hot water didn't want to stay on. And now I just want to get drunk and tell everyone exactly what I think of them. And I need a job. And unemployment isn't paying yet.
At least I have written something today, I've edited some of the old parts of the novel, nothing new, really. And I walked 2.5 miles. And I napped for a couple of hours. Depression napping. Dreamed that the guy who played Red on That 70's Show was my lover.
I don't want to cook dinner. I don't want to be the wife today. I don't want to be anybody's anything.
Maybe I'll go to camp tomorrow and swim in the lake.
Maybe not.

Floors

My writing mentor pointed out to me not long ago that I described floors a lot in my writing (what they are made of, how they are patterned, whether there are rugs, etc.), but that I rarely describe ceilings. I have no idea what this means, but I'm sure there is something psychological about it.

Whew!

I haven't written anything for 2 days. Must fix that today. (Ha! I typed toady first! Am I a sycophant or a faerie pretending to be a reptile?)

Wednesday I attended the Kauffman FastTrac mixer with Russ and made some really cool connections with some people. It was a great time.

Yesterday was spent recovering mostly.

Today I shall write. Oh, yeah, and look for a job.

Hello Summer

Nice to see you again. Walking may require me to start getting up with Av and exercising around 6am. Whew.
Let's see if I can get a few words on the screen during what is turning out to be a busy day.

My First Submittal

I just sent off a story to an erotica anthology for the very first time.
It was easier than I thought. I don't even care if it makes it or not, the first hurdle has finally been passed.
Go me.

Evening update:
It was denied, not for content, but for length, but since it is a poem, it is the length it needs to be. I am not disappointed and I'm glad I did it.

Right now I am writing something ridiculously romantic and I can't help myself.

Progress

Over the last 4 or 5 days I have turned the very, very bad original Chapter 1 into four much, much better chapters. I am very pleased with myself. The next task is to take the current Chapter 5 and fix it. This is where my heroine wakes up in a dungeon and the story really starts.

My problem now is remembering to actually look for a job as well. I'm having too much fun being unemployed. Starting to think about Kickstarter, but I don't know if I want to make that heavy of a commitment yet.